So, what about love? 

What is it about that word that is so easily used, and even more often abused?

As a child I wouldn’t go anywhere unless my favorite Teddy Bear came along . . . couldn’t even sleep without it.

I must have been about four and I had just discovered love, for sure.

This first love lasted about a year or two, till Teddy became violently ill. Trails of snow white flakes followed every step I took, Teddy’s poor torso growing thinner by the day, as he literally spilled his guts. 

With my heart broken for the first time, he was binned.

While growing into a teenager I realized there must be more to this love-thing.

My first real boy-crush confirmed that thought. A wild herd of butterflies raging through my system made sure I couldn’t eat, sleep or utter a single syllable that made any sense . . . ah, now that was love.

And, it was going to last forever, for sure. With a fierce determination I snagged the first official boyfriend. Once in my web, however, love wasn’t that much fun anymore.

The couple-thing was a bit too much for me, and the kissing – yikes!  

He may not have left a trail of flakes like Teddy, but he did loose a lot of saliva.

Honestly, I had to watch myself not slippin’ and slidin’ away through his puddles of drool.

With his heart broken, he was binned.

So, love was ok but it came with conditions for me now. One of my first conditions was no wet kissing and, of course, no thick white socks (barf)!

All through my life I have added and changed conditions.

For example, a sense of humour became a must, while wet kissing slowly disappeared from the list (it has its advantages). 

The socks came and went a few times, and are now allowed only when accompanied by brains (which in reality comes down to this: when my partner says something stupid he immediately has to take his socks off).

Conditional love was established . . . and stayed.

Friends and husbands came and went, all in the name of conditional love.

There are certain things a partner or friend shouldn’t do, because it can kill the love you feel for them, resulting in slow and painful process which shows us just where to draw our lines or how difficult it is to forgive.

By becoming a mother I went through another process, just as slow and painful.

I learned about unconditional love.

There is nothing in this world any of my children could do to make me stop loving them or love them less. Nothing I couldn’t forgive, nothing that would make me add . . . an if or a but.

The thought alone of losing them is excruciating, having to deal with it would be unbearable. Unconditional love must be by far the deepest, most vibrant and frightening feeling in the universe, the real thing, for sure.

Therefore my kids are my Valentines and I hope I will always be theirs.

Happy Valentine’s Day.