EUROVISION 2006:
THOUGHTS AFTER THE FACT (And hopefully the final word)
By Sophia Klidi, Ko-Go Staff Writer

       
  Us with our simple spear and them with their mighty rockets.

I confess, this is the first year I watched Eurovision "the show" on TV. I also followed faithfully, sometimes maniacally, all the idle chit-chat and gossip shows where so many self-professed Eurovision experts told me that the "absolute" diva of the Greek music scene, Ana Vissi, will explode on the stage and capture all the votes.

I was told her Jean Paul Gautier original gown (rumoured price: 170,000 Euros) would capture the essence of Greece and its people, and beam it out to the world. Then there were all those videos of Vissi doing "Everything!" I saw them all, and I believed . . . halleluiah, I believed!

There was Vissi in a trendy jean miniskirt belting it out. There was Vissi in an array of stylish glitter giving it her all. And, my personal favourite all time Vissi in tight jeans and little white T-shirt with a couple of swallows over her left breast (Gautier, be damned) where the goddess falls on her knees and gives it her all in a crescendo finish.

Oh, what pathos . . . yes, indeed, I was sold. I knew for certain Greece would win. Well, definitely in the first three . . . and absolutely positively in the top five.
       
 
       
  I watched the semi-finals as Annette Artani, the Greek-American who represented Cyprus, took the stage and delivered her ballad in a strong, soulful, heartfelt voice. Just her and her song . . . and she didn't make it to the finals! What! Oh, oh – I started to worry. She's similar to Anna Vissi.

The following day I was told by the "experts" that Anet didn't make it because she did "an imitation of Beyonce," but Vissi would shine because she is the "Greek Madonna." Excuse me, say that again.

So, now it's the night of the big event – the finals. I felt the rhythm as Romanian entry Mihai Traistariu delivered the beautiful Tornero. I delighted to the creative sound of the We Are the Winners by LT United of Lithuania, and wanted to vote, vote, vote. The acts were so upbeat and now.
       
 
       
 

Then Vissi came on stage with an 80s gown and an 80s performance. Anna, if you read the Ko-Go Khronicles, listen to one of your biggest fans. You are the absolute Greek diva . . . you have pathos. But only the Greeks understood it, and they couldn't vote for you. (According to Eurovision rules, viewers are not being allowed to vote for their own country's entry.) Then, of course, Lordi of Finland commandeered the stage and stole the show.

Anna, unfortunately you were just a simple spear doing battle with the super, state-of-the-art rockets of Romania, Lithuania and Finland.

Finally, a word about the production of the show itself. Very respectable, but what were those little "post card" videos extolling the beauties of Greece which came on before each act? All of that kokoretsi and tzatziki was nothing more than a touristy taverna's dream . . . or nightmare. Greece, shame on you. Kokoretsi, by the way, was outlawed as a menu item by the EU some two years ago! Not too many people know that fact, but certainly the experts at the Public Broadcasting Television, which was in charge of the show, should have.

Perhaps, when the tacky Mr. Paul of Holland was rambling on about "saki, tsaki, katsiki," while giving all his country's 12 votes to Turkey, what he really was saying was: too much tzatziki, Greece!