THROUGH MY EYES
By Renie Spykerman
AUGUST BLUES

       
  August is by far the worst month of the year for anyone employed in tourism, which means most of us. We are suffering through heat waves, trying desperately to still be nice to thousands of unknown faces called tourists. Too many days of working too many hours, no time off, staying as white as yoghurt ‘cause there is no time for the beach.

No wonder we all come into a state of depression. This horribly underestimated psychological problem plays havoc on our state of minds and should be recognized as an official illness. Some names come to mind immediately like Cretanitis or Touristphobia. A therapy should be developed, by professionals of course, but knowing how medical people work, this will definitely take quite some time.

So, for those as impatient as we are, we have come up with a quick fix. Whenever irritations blow out of proportion, or small disagreements become full fledged wars, or lovers’ quarrels become appointments at lawyers' offices, just whip out the guitar, let it all out and belt out the lyrics of our own August Blues (Sung to your favourite blues tune, such as Mannish Boy by Muddy Waters or Gangster Love by Johnny Guitar Watson.)

Waking up every morning
Totally covered in sweat
Wanna make love to my baby
But the sheets are all wet

I ain’t nothing but tired
Starting to look like a pig
Gotta get to work
Please can’t I just call in sick

I’ve got the august blues baby
Summer‘s a pain in the butt
I’ve got the august blues baby
It’s just too bloody hot
And when mentioning those tourists
I think they all should be shot

Serving another Mousaka
Or another shirt to sell
Renting out bikes full insurance
Oh that necklace suits you so well

Gotta get out of this business
I know I ain’t gonna last
Time has to be my saviour
Oh Lord, may October be comin’ fast

I’ve got the August blues baby
Summer’s a pain in the butt
I’ve got the august blues baby
It’s just too bloody hot
And when mentioning those tourists
I think they all should be shot
(repeat refrain as often as you like!)

Authors note:
The above is to be used freely by all those in desperate need. Suggestions in lyric changes are very welcome. No harm was intended with these lyrics, it is the product of our worn out imagination due to too many 24/7s